With the mandate of "News" and in itself.
With the mandate of "News" and in itself.
At first the person works on reputation, then reputation - on
It. Or - against it. The Same, with addition against, concerns to
Trades.
Having given to a trade of the journalist almost half a century, I cannot now
To break tightly pasted shortcut of the foreign affairs specialist, still already -
The Americanist. Itself it is guilty, speak to me as itself has deduced
Itself under a name the Americanist in one of
Politiko-autobiographical narrations. And what for to break, when
This shortcut deserved and to a certain extent even the honourable? Then,
Expensive colleagues and readers, that a trade already the person, a shortcut,
If want, it is burdensome and humiliating, and than you live - while longer
You live! - the you test from it certain, being expressed more
In a fashionable way, psychological discomfort.
All people different - even twins. And it are children of time and
The Fatherland which in our case you will not name the happy.
To the foreign affairs specialist everyone in the measure, it is added only
Professional double sight. It - between the people, though on
Decline of a life is even stronger, than in a youth, you feel
Particle of the people because all your nature is impregnated
Its newest history.
In hope of interest of the reader and with gratitude "the General
To the newspaper "which has shown friendly attention to
To the veteran-izvestintsu, I offer a number of extraction, "semiridiculous,
Semisad ", from diaries, working notebooks, road records
Different years. Absolutely short and is longer, all of them are made in a mode
Real time, without updating backdating, back mind.
Also cover almost all second half of leaving century, though
Chronological sequence - for internal dramatic nature -
It is not always maintained.
Since morning we have a seat in a cart;
We are glad a head to break.
And, despising laziness and luxury,
We shout: Has gone!.
A.Pushkin, "a life Cart".
Others on a live trace
Will pass your way behind a span a span...
B.Pasternak.
Ink old faded colour.
And different handwriting of different years.
And even days...
A.Tvardovsky.
21. 06. 1985, Moscow.
NOT To the Victory 40 ANNIVERSARY, and the thought, from which has now come
For a long time becomes not on itself. When you look at the present world, in
Which the young cannot protolkatsja through numbers of the seniors in any way,
You think, that in days of our youth the world was more spacious also to us
It was easier to move in him. But it was tragical open space: the world
For us, for development by us who were starting out a life, have released,
Victims have cleared, having left in a non-existence and by that "from road".
* * *.
21. 01. 1987, Moscow.
OLD thought: the idea (including "our", great) cannot be
The automatic. When the idea becomes, so to say,
State, it - as the person, its carrying out. At Lenin
The idea was Lenin (Lenin with colleagues and atmospheres, which
They created). At Stalin the idea became Stalin, though
Was called Lenin or Lenin-Stalin's banner. At Khruschev
The idea became Khruschev's, Antistalin, but zabubenno corn.
At Brezhnev - Brezhnev's, vain, with bushy eyebrows and
Five gold stars; towards the end of it called "bormotuha five
Asterisks ". At Antropov... CHernenko as though completely
Proved, that to everyone it on a shoulder - to carry out that
Was called as still Lenin idea.
At last, Gorbachev - both publicity, and revival, hopes...
The Gorbachevsky idea has come nearer to Lenin or, more precisely, to a problem
To clear away avgievy the stables left predecessors and already
Led to our backwardness in the world, to blasting of the nature and bases
Lives in the people and the country.
Whether for a long time? Is at all in mind, both supporters, and sceptics, and
The latent opponents. To protect idea, it is necessary to take it under
Law protection... Ah, if the earth native has got rid of this
Eternal lottery: what person, what leader we will extend? Also has given
Superiority to the law, i.e. the constitutional democracy.
* * *.
23.03.1987, Rome, hotel "Dignity-petro".
ONLY at the moment of explosions new so it is keen on itself, that
Abolishes old even in its monuments. If new, in time
To become outdated and, apparently, to understand a relativity of the demands in
All seeing history, continues to persist in work destruction
Ancestors and memory of them is a certificate demonic
Ignorance or the fanaticism which has not left from ignorance. "Even"
The bureaucracy living only on today and looking only on
The heads, should not have the rights to past destruction in it
Material displays.
In Rome, as well as in Venice, you see, that peaceful co-existence
Centuries and today - a sign on culture, civilisation level
Societies.
* * *.
27. 04. 1989, London.
The ROYAL CASTLE Windsor is old in an environment old
Not royal, pridvortsovogo. Old, but filled new,
The XX-th century end, its technics and the goods. We drank in one of
Taverns the Danish beer "Karlsberg" also ate the Italian pizza, that vrjad
Whether it was possible "even" in XIX century. Were photographed against
krasnomundirnyh guardsmen in artificial-bear, nylon
papahah. Nylon as ecologists protect bears,
Royal family - for environment protection.
Old, impregnated new, is and there is a tradition,
Continuity, organic communication when the today's grows
From the yesterday's. The tradition is a tree, instead of the car.
England is densely occupied in vicinities of London, but protects the
The well-known greens also stores old houses. "Love to the native
To the ashes ", and it is even better to the native house where also walls help, - with
It, probably, begins, to these there is a person...
Yesterday there was a wonderful warm day, and in Sent-dzhejms-square sang
Birdies, were dismissed from large well-groomed kidneys the elastic wax
Leaves, stood old, m., two hundred year's trees, which at us
Time-two and obchelsja. In these trees - England, in their absence, in
Neglect them - Russia cancelling every yesterday for the sake of
Ideal - and unattainable - tomorrow's. And trees do not grow in
odnochase, as well as traditions, as well as riches which is you see
In the London streets - one was added on to one, not
Collapsed.
* * *.
16. 09. 1990, Vienna.
BUSINESS TRIPS - that is empty, is dense. On September, 7-11th was in
Helsinki - Gorbachev and Bush's meeting. Four days in Moscow - and here
Vienna. A subject - negotiations on conventional armaments and as all
Has changed in Europe for two with small year. Differently
Process of disarmament when there is at us a dismantle is looked also
In total and everything, and on a way to the market economy slides in a precipice, and
Already, apparently, simply it is not allowed us to time to reap the fruits
The international agreements on "reasonable sufficiency" and conversion.
I write now in the Viennese hotel. And morning was in Moscow, too
Empty even for Sunday as though it saved forces for
Mass demonstration with the requirement of resignation Ryzhkova, the last
Whipping boy for a management from which remained practically
One Gorbachev. So it was ridiculously spent historically gained
Reorganisation that forces to recollect - though would not be desirable itself
To frighten - ancient wisdom about good intentions, with which
The road to a hell is paved.
Already in the plane in Sunday native "News" on the first
To strip an explosive material: "Where it was gone?". Meat. From 1274
The shops trading in Moscow in meat, its sale is stopped on
Today in 730 (for June, 22nd - in 35, one month ago - in 65, on August, 24th
- In 272 shops). In the Moscow refrigerators of stocks of meat 12
Thousand tons, for five days. One of the reasons - compassionate and
malopraktichnye new democrats from Mossoveta from the allocated
To Moscow of funds have passed 100 thousand tons of meat to neighbouring areas -
That therefrom did not go in capital. Itself cut down, and that not
Has got...
Meanwhile bourgeois Vienna in a Sunday way it is slow
Saunters, admiring able to be a beautiful city from it
The glorified baroque, sits at restaurants, vinarnjah,
The cafe-espresso, absorbs on the move at Southern station of sausage,
Sausages and sandwiches from excellent bread and an excellent ham. And I
Has exchanged travellers, having bought in the evening with a roll two hot
Tasty sausages, which in all our immense Union not
You will find anywhere. In the Kremlin buffets, speak, they too now in
Cellophane.
Here to you and the subject of conventional armaments blocked where as
More impressing realities.
From Moscow has brought a fresh joke. The person comes: "I Want
To enter the CPSU. To whom to address? "The answer:" Address to
To the psychiatrist ".
Took with itself in road reprint, 1909, the edition of "Marks".
There Berdjaev in article "Philosophical true and intellectual
The truth "writes about the utilitarian relation of the Russian intelligency to
To philosophy and culture.
"With Russian intelligency owing to its historical position
There was here what sort a misfortune: love to the levelling
Justice, to public good, to the national blessing
Have paralysed love to true, almost that have destroyed interest to
To true ".
"Poor Nitsshe and poor Russian thought! What only dishes not
Submit with vodka of Russian intelligency, and all it priemlet, all
Eats, in hope that will be angrily won autocracies and will be
The people "are released.
* * *.
3-5. 03. 1992, "Barvikha".
SINCE YESTERDAY in sanatorium "Barvikha" - with Clara.
It has appeared - to get easily on this resort situated near Moscow
Olympus, when poraskidalo former dignitaries, and new still, probably,
Not vzmatereli, have not begun to enjoy.
Decaying - but yet so that very much - magnificence of empire,
Which here did not regret means for "high level" - solidity
Rooms, qualification and courtesy of the personnel.
And spring, nothing knowing, - behind a window. The spring knowing only
eternal, early, with thawed snow lakes on paths, with the white
Still the high, crude, bulked up snow. Has slightly strewn lightly at night
Pines and fur-trees, has whitewashed, the glade, or wood became and more more beautiful
The prospectus going from the case to white lake where on snow it is possible
To see and fearless kosulju. Their two, let out them from open-air cages.
From the chronicle of times of wreck of empire. The system finds out in
The agony moment the monstrous unity, and empire wreck is possible
To observe, its picture to write, being in any point. "Barvikha"
- One of the well-known, exclusive, reserved foundations.
And here a sketch of bewilderment of the person on duty below, at an input. Decades
The special courier, straight from publishing house "Truth", brought with
Early morning, by a breakfast of dignitaries-otdyhajushih a hot
The main information and propaganda foundations - newspapers "Truth".
Yesterday for the first time instead of "Truth", "Member of the Komsomol", "the Soviet Russia" in
In advance prepared by publishing house for "Barvikha" a package
There was a newspaper "Business world". Others were not.
"The business world" - unknown, "marginalnyj" - has broken
"Truth". From this week it leaves only three times - Tuesday,
Thursday, Saturday. Has notified readers, that soon can in general
To be closed. And here begin day as it is got by decades, with
"Truths", not knowing, that it now the oppositional. Or
"Barvikha" is oppositional also? No, "Barvikha" inertsionna.
* * *.
13. 07. 1999, Moscow.
YOUR last letter to a certain extent epohalno: after all
The epoch was replaced, one has left, and in another people, apparently, have forgot
To write letters. And suddenly...
Judging by your letter, in the Kazakhstan edges too comes true
The universal formula modern Russian TSitserona: "Wanted
As it is better, and it has turned out as always ". It well lines a result
All Russian XX-th century also has at all superseded one time, at
Gorbachev, - remember? - Taking root into a policy categorical
Imperative of yours odnoplemennika Immanuila the Edging: "the Star sky
Over us, the moral law - in us ". A policy -
The moral?! In the Russian history the categorical dominates
Victor Tchernomyrdin's imperative.
(From the undispatched letter to the Kazakhstan German F.K., waiting
Exit visas, after the brother, to Germany).
* * *.
11.03.1969, Kislovodsk.
As Tvardovsky cried...
The THIRD walk with Konstantin Mihajlovichem Simonov and it
Wife Larissa, this time to "the Big saddle". We go in single file on
To snow-covered track, in a black jacket the back ahead shakes
The writer, clearing road.
Towards from snow desert the person in fur,
bagrationovskoj to a peak-cap.
- In any way Gulija, - Simonov jokes.
Gulija too has a rest in "Red stones", too carries the fur
Peak-cap, but it is with a stomach, an unbuttoned shirt and character
The sybarite - cannot be presented here.
Between Simonov and me Larissa's back in nylon white-dark blue
To jacket with dark blue leaves on a white background, and I speak: Guliju here
To see - all the same that Jesus Christ with apostles.
I add "with apostles" that Larissa has not thought, that
I compare to the Christ of sybarite Gulija, both she guesses, and to it on
Memory comes the same image, which - from this deserted,
Unfriendly plateau on a wind - my comparison is called. We
Both at once we recollect a film "the Gospel from Matfeja" Pazolini. There in
To the finest scene the Christ went with pupils on the deserted
To great plateau accompanied by sounding absolutely on-bahovski
Russian melody "Oh you, steppe wide".
- Looked? - I ask it. Yes, two of them looked this
Film on the European congress of writers. - very much it was pleasant, -
She speaks and more adds: - Tvardovsky so cried. So
Cried, though the film was without a caption, in Italian...
And going the first the Simonov, at which and on a wind very good
The hearing, speaks as though apologising and for itself, that did not cry, and for
Tvardovsky, that that cried: after all it we the semiliterate people, and
Tvardovsky the Gospel well knows.
And all the day long it came to me: as he cried. And in the evening
I have understood: he cried not only because knows the Gospel better
Simonov. He also wishes to achieve so obviously good and
Also is subject to the crucifixion.
The higher degree of talent of the artist - in ruthlessness, in
Self-exposure (through itself or through others), in frankness. In
That ruthlessness when the person does not spare itself, brings itself on
The altar of the understood truth which have opened to it, and for it is not present other
Choice, and if also there is a choice to formulate it it is possible as
Choice between two suicides - suicide, which
The truth opened by it from those who suppresses it will draw upon it,
The nobility does not want, and suicide which will come if it
Will contrive to suppress this truth in itself.
* * *.
23. 08. 1965, Ketchum, the State of Idaho.
I DID NOT ASK miss Mary about circumstances of death of Ernest
Hemingueja. But in them ketchumskom the house the widow has told: "It was shot
Here ", - having specified in a vestibule. The gun rack there is not present now. But
The input in the house suddenly looks ominously and misticheski - as if
You step through a corpse.
Before flying away from Ketchuma called to miss Mary, has told, that has come
At last the suitcase which has gone at air flight and in him a bottle
Russian vodka - whether it is impossible to deliver it as a gift...
Mary was sleepy - and lost: after all as consider, that
The life is not lived, it will be only memory of the great person.
- And, vodka! Very pleasantly. Russian vodka is a little sweetish.
I say, that pogorche smirnovskoj. It turns on a cap:
Let's try on a drink. We will break all good bourgeois
Traditions also we will drink since morning.
* * *.
23. 03. 1968, New York.
At the AMERICAN of the relation with the country - as the contract,
The contract, the agreement. It has not executed conditions - it breaks off
The contract also demands compensation. At us - relations family,
The blood. Both love, and a pain, and unwillingness to share troubles with
Strangers, with not members of a family. It is difficult to them to understand the nature of ours
Patriotism. You feel sonositelem (a foolish word)
Ideas, for which destiny in the answer. You worry about everything, that is
In your country. And it is easier to American to keep separate, because
The contract individual.
* * *.
14-15. 06. 1971,
Moscow - Khabarovsk.
Prologue over Yenisei.
ON THE VERGE OF cloud rising have left the sky, and the earth has opened,
Boundless, is vague-brownish tones. Because of horizon slowly
Two grey, dim, prihotlivo-merging tapes have crept out.
- Small river here it is more than ours, - the navigator has grinned.
The pre-dawn earth was pervozdanno-deserted. It seemed, that
Just now, only for us a two - for it dexterously sitting in
Working armchair sideways to the earth, and for me, clumsily and respectfully
Settled down before it on any small pillow, - the certificate is created
Confluences of Stony Tunguska of Yenisei.
Though also the darkness behind a window, but is not slept, when you for the first time
Here so - in all its length - you fly over Russia. I toiled on the
Place, and then all the same has not born, has thrust in pilotskuju
Cabin. And now, flattered, sat in Turkish on a small pillow,
Looking forward and downwards through a horizontal, transparent dome, being afraid
To prevent this working person and feeling, however, as it
It is flattered by unexpected visit of the correspondent. To it was necessary
The stranger to become the god. And more two flattered gods
Towered behind it in pilotskih armchairs, and on sights,
Which they have thrown on me, I have understood, that was not present, the secret is not got rid
Romantic heat of their trade, let it became three times mass and
Every day. No, it is not got rid, anyway on this honourable
To line Moscow - Khabarovsk, during these pre-dawn instants, when
Their passengers sleep, and the crashing roar of motors cannot block in any way
In consciousness imperious silence of the huge earth.
Having peeped appointment of Yenisei to Stony Tunguska, I have returned
On the place, has again tried to fall asleep, but here has interfered
The sun, slepjashche having struck in eyelids. The sun has filled in at once all sky,
Has rushed into windows, having rejected pity obstacles
zanavesochek. On the combined speed of the earth and the plane with might and main shparilo
Sparkling morning, and passengers, fidgeting from light, slept - on
To Moscow time, in the Moscow night...
STANISLAV KONDRASHOV.
<$>
//* an information Source: the General newspaper, 7.10.99
//* Reg. Nom. - 1091000094.11-------------------------------------------
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